The Taito Project
by Rubisco
Summary: Yamato and Taichi. Yagami and Ishida. A match made in heaven. Their friends, led by an overly obssessed TK, set out to push the pair together. But they are all in for a tiny little surprise. (Taito)
1. The Meeting

Standard Disclaimer: Don't own it. 

Author's Note: I wanted to write something cheerful. My Inferno is too depressing.

The Taito Project 

Chapter 1 - The Meeting 

"We are here," said Takeru solemnly, without a trace of his usual smile, "to discuss an issue of utmost importance." 

Hikari stared. Koushiro frowned. Jyou panicked. 

And Daisuke pointed an accusing finger at his boyfriend, asking loudly, "Ken, have you been trying to take over the digital world _again_?" 

Takeru sighed in annoyance as Ken smacked the goggle head. 

"A _personal_ issue," he specified. 

"Well, why are we all here then?" Daisuke asked, rubbing his head, "and why are you talking like Izzy?" 

Koushiro smacked him. 

"I have reason to believe," Takeru continued, ignoring him, "that my brother is...gay." 

He held his breath here, as if expecting a chorus of shocked cries. 

Daisuke yawned widely. Hikari studied her nails. Jyou shrugged. Koushiro smiled knowingly. 

"Is that all?" Asked Ken. 

"What?" Takeru asked incredulously, "you are not the least bit surprised?" 

"C'mon, TK. _Yamato_? Of course he's gay. We figured that out ages ago." 

"How?" Takeru looked ready to cry, "_how_?" 

"He can cook. His hair is more important to him than his life. He has a fashion sense. _And_ he stares at Tai. A lot." 

"Which reminds me," Hikari said casually, "Tai's gay too."  
  
"And I don't suppose _Taichi_ can cook?" Takeru asked scathingly, thoroughly pissed off. 

"Oh no. But he stares at Yamato. _All_ the time." 

"I just had a brilliant idea!" Everyone turned to see Daisuke bouncing in his seat. "Let's hook them up!" 

"No," Takeru hissed sharply, "that's _my_ brilliant idea. _I_ called this meeting. _I _thought of it first. Therefore it is _my _idea that we hook them up." 

Silence. 

"So...how do we get them together?" 

Ken grinned evilly. "That's easy. We kidnap Yamato, strip him naked and chain him to a bed. Then we lure Taichi into the room and lock the door. I can lend him my whip." 

More silence as everyone imagined a naked angry Yama tied to the bed. 

"Hey!" Takeru yelled. "Stop fantasizing about my brother!" 

"We need to do something legal," Hikari said thoughtfully. 

"We could cover Yamato in chocolate. Would that help?" 

"Ken!"

OOOOOO

"Tai?" Liquid blue eyes looked up at him, and Taichi could feel himself turning into goo. 

"Shhh," he brushed the corner of Yamato's mouth with his lips, whispering, "we shouldn't talk." 

"Why not?" Yamato whispered back, childlike. 

"Because," Taichi undid the top button on Yamato's shirt, easing the other boy down to the bed, "when you talk you miss out on other things." 

His hand released the last button, and peeled off Yamato's shirt. 

"Really?" Yamato asked in that soft, velvet like whisper. 

"Really," Taichi ran his hands down Yamato's sides, "and they are enjoyable things too." 

"Like what?" 

"Like this," and Taichi caught the blonde's lips in a loving, lingering kiss. 

"Hmm," Yamato sighed, and Taichi fell in love all over again. 

He was memorizing that pale skin with his teeth and tongue when the phone rang. 

Yamato stretched out to answer it. 

"Hello? Hi TK...nothing, I'm just studying with Taichi...um...we are doing Chemistry, that's right..." 

Taichi snickered. Sure, he was studying all right, but not Chemistry. Yamato was much more interesting than that. He pulled off the blonde's pants. 

Yamato smacked him. 

"Really? Okay...we'll be there...see you." 

"We'll be where?" Taichi asked, brushing his nose against Yamato's chest and not really caring about the answer. 

"The park," Yamato breathed, "there's a get together this weekend between our friends." 

"I see," said Taichi, pushing the bit of information into the back of his head. 

He and Yamato were alone for now, and that's all that really mattered.

OOOOOO

Author's Note: I'm lazy. This chapter is officially over. Next chapter should be fun... 

Rubisco. Is. An. Enzyme.


	2. The Closet

Standard Disclaimer: Don't own it. 

Author's Note: About time I updated this one, huh? Please forgive anything odd in this fic. Also I've never seen season two, so please don't get mad at me for any mistakes I might have made. Thank you all for your comments. And I'm just going to make it clear right now. There won't be a lemon. I just can't...write them...oooruns away to hideooo

The Taito Project

Attempt 1 - The Closet

**Objectives:** To lock Yagami together with Ishida in a closet of limited space for an extended period of time, and to have excellent ice cream. Flavor is debatable.

**Leader of Operation: **Takaishi Takeru /because he doesn't trust the rest of us/

**Materials: **One picnic at the park, one soccer ball, one computer room, one fake digital world emergency, one coat closet, one combination lock, two fake janitors bribed with Daisuke's money, one dense Yagami, one clue less Ishida, and 21 ice cream cones. Flavor is debatable.

**Genius of the Week: **Ichijouji Ken /Anyone who disagrees can go fight Daisuke right now. We are not responsible for _any _injuries thus acquired/

**Procedure: **

1. Have a lovely picnic in the park. Invite Ishida and Yagami.  
2. Play a game of soccer. Act normal.  
3. A laptop will beep precisely 14 minutes and 23 seconds after initiation of the game. Tell Yagami and Ishida it's an emergency.  
4. Drag Yagami and Ishida to the school computer room.  
5. Have the fake janitors approach computer room.  
6. Pretend to hide. Shove Yagami and Ishida into coat closet.  
7. Apply combination lock and leave.  
8. Buy 21 ice cream cones. Flavor is debatable.

OOOOOO

It was a beautiful day. So beautiful he couldn't feel himself touch the ground. His lovely, angelic boyfriend had cooked him a heavenly lunch. His lovely, angelic boyfriend was sitting right in front of him. The sky was clear. The birds were singing. And Ishida Yamato belonged to him.

"Taichi, you are drooling."

Ishida Yamato belonged to him.

Smack!

Taichi fell back to earth abruptly to see a very smug Yama staring back at him.

"Ow."

"You deserved it."

"Hmph."

"Hurry up. We are going to be late."

"Where are we going again?"

Sigh.

"Seriously! I don't remember."

"The park. Yagami. We are supposed to meet our friends."

"Oh."

"What is wrong with you today? You keep drifting off. What are you thinking about?"

"You."

"Really."

"I think about you a lot, Yama. All the time. You know that?"

Silence.

Silence.

Blue eyes stared at brown eyes.

They didn't get out of the apartment for a long time.

OOOOOO

"They. Are. Late." Takeru grit out between clenched teeth.

"Don't worry about it," Hikari said hastily, laying a gentle hand on his arm. "You know how they are."

"Yeah," Daisuke agreed. "And anyway, I thought the plan was to lock them in a closet?"

"It is." Takeru twitched.

"Then why are we all at the park?"

Not in the mood to have his boyfriend murdered, Ken spoke up. "Because it would be less suspicious that way, Dai."

"Ooohhh."

Ken smiled a little, pleased. They had a genius with them after all. What could possibly go wrong?

OOOOOO

Taichi and Yamato showed up an hour later, looking incredibly happy. Taichi in particular kept grinning foolishly at nothing.

They'd already eaten, which was just as well, since Daisuke had polished off whatever food remained in their picnic baskets.

Yamato flat out refused to play soccer, and Taichi...always followed Yamato.

So the rest of the group played soccer, while Yamato and Taichi settled down in the shadows of a large tree, whispering together.

Taichi and Yamato's whispered conversation:

"Can I tell them?"

"No. Why would you want to?"

"So I can kiss you in public."

"I'll never let you kiss me in public, Taichi. It's not polite."

"Yama..."

"Don't whine. It's remarkable how they still have no clue, after three months..."

"They'll never figure it out if we don't tell them."

"Taichi..."

"Just one little kiss? Please? Nobody's looking."

"Oh...all right."

Insert long pause.

"Taichi! That was more than just a little kiss!"

"Oops..."

Sigh.

"If we tell everyone about us, then your fan girls might leave you alone..."

"...Only to be replaced by fan boys?"

"Oh..."

"Let's just wait and see how dense our friends really are. Okay?"

"Okay. But can _I _tell them?"

Sigh.

OOOOOO

Koushiro's laptop beeped on time. They dragged Yamato and Taichi to the school computer room.

The victims weren't very happy.

"So, you guys can go," Taichi said, arms crossed. "Why the hell do _we _have to come?"

Takeru clamped a hand over Taichi's mouth. "Shh...do you hear something?"

"Mmmph."

"It's the janitors! Everyone. Hide!"

"Mmph!"

"Here, Yamato, Taichi, you guys can go into the closet. Koushiro, Jyou, behind that desk over there..."

Yamato and Taichi were shoved into the closet.

Takeru clicked the lock in place.

Many hand shakes and pats on the back followed.

They went out to buy their ice cream.

OOOOOO

Inside the closet:

"Taichi, your elbow's in my gut."

"Mmmph, soooorryy."

"Are you sniffing my hair?"

"No..."

"You...are..."

"Smell good. You changed shampoos, no?"

"Shh! What's happening out there."

They listened to the silence.

"Yama...you stepped on my...toeeeee..."

"Sorry, but I can't hear anything. Can you?"

"No..."

"Taichi."

"Yes?"

"Get your hand off there."

"But.."

"_Now._"

"Okay."

Yamato tried to open the closet.

And failed.

"We are locked in."

"Are we?"

Yamato knocked on the closet door. "Hey guys! Let us out of here."

Nothing happened.

"Those bastards, where did they go?"

"And they kidnapped my sister!"

"I can't believe this."

"I know. I'm stuck in a closet with the hottest guy ever who happens to be my boyfriend. What are the odds?"

"Taichi..."

"You know you want to, little Yama-chan."

"Gah!"

And that's the last thing Yamato said for a very long time. It's difficult to escape a Yagami in a closet of limited space.

OOOOOO

They returned an hour later to view the fruits of their labor.

The closet door was opened with much flourish and their victims tumbled out.

Ishida glared.

Yagami glared.

"So...what did you guys do in there?"

"We came up with a list. A very _long _list."

"That's all?"

"That's all. And you know what the title of that list is?"

"Um..."

"Fifty different ways to kill our friends."

"I see..."

"Did you guys at least save us some ice cream?"

Daisuke looked up, mouth full of the last cone. "Um..."

They spent the rest of the day running for their lives.

OOOOOO

**Attempt One Failed.**

OOOOOO

Rubisco. Is. An. Enzyme.


	3. The Letter

Standard Disclaimer: Don't own it. 

Author's Note: Uh...this is one long chapter to write. I'm sooo tired, and my shoulders have cramped, and I feel like grumbling, and you people better like this chapter, and I am _so_ tired. /cries/ but I can go to bed. That's right! I _can_ go to bed. Yah!

Good night. And thanks all for the reviews.

The Taito Project

Attempt 2 - The Letter

**Objectives: **To successfully imitate Yagami's handwriting with the purpose of forging a love letter, to deliver this letter with Yagami's signature to Ishida's locker, and to observe the effect of too much stress on the phenomenon Ichijouji Ken. Method is debatable.

**Leader of Operation: **Ichijouji Ken (Because we don't trust Takaishi anymore)

**Materials: **Various samples of Yagami's awful handwriting, Ichijouji Ken to forge the product, pens, pencils, paper, envelope, and weapon of mass destruction (Namely, Daisuke as a fatal distraction to Kaiser in case Ichijouji has a nervous breakdown and tries to take over the world again).

**Genius of the Week: **Ichijouji Ken (Izzy had a fork fight with Daisuke over this title. He lost. Badly.)

**Procedure: **

1. Hikari will steal Taichi's past school notes, _if_ he didn't burn them all.  
2. Lock Ichijouji in a tiny room without food until he can successfully imitate Yagami's writing.  
3. Upon completion of step 2, note stress level of Ichijouji by recording state of hair and nails, color of eyes, are they bloodshot?  
4. Compose a mushy, poetic love letter of impressive length and make Ichijouji copy it out. (Note: Letter should be written in lavender ink on pale pink paper)  
5. Upon completion of step 4, note stress level of Ichijouji by recording state of hair and nails, color of eyes, are they bloodshot?  
6. Put the final product in a bright pink envelope, and seal with crimson heart stickers.  
7. It may be wise to make several handwritten copies of the letter. Ishida is an unpredictable, sexy, beautiful, sexy, moody, sexy...guy. Anyway...this is a good idea...  
8. Upon completion of step 7, note stress level of Ichijouji by recording state of hair and nails, color of eyes, are they bloodshot? (Note: If Ichijouji shows any signs of instability, activate weapon of mass destruction immediately. In plainer words, feed Daisuke chocolate.)  
9. Slide one copy of the product into Ishida's locker.  
10. Observe results using the fine art of spying. _Do_ hide any signs of over excitement.  
11. Check: Is Ichijouji still alive? Is Daisuke still alive?

OOOOOO

He'd never liked coffee. The thick, bitter black liquid was too different from the sweetness of chocolate.

Chocolate and Daisuke. Ken caught himself with the most disgusting grin on his face, and quickly shook his head to clear it. Horrible! He was getting too soft in his old age. Maybe he was coming down with something. Yeah, that's it. Cold and ruthless genius boy _could not_ be found sappy. He was just tired.

Which brought his attention back to the steaming cup in his hands, and he wrinkled his nose in distaste.

Why the others had chosen _this_ time of all times to launch operation 2 was beyond him. Didn't they know he had _midterms_? Even Daisuke knew to give him some room during exam week. He had a reputation to keep, after all. And forging a love letter was the _least_ of his worries.

He bit back a yawn, wondering when that awful coffee would kick in. He _hated_ falling asleep in class.

"Hey," a voice snapped rather rudely from behind. "No drinks in the computer lab."

Ken felt one corner of his mouth twitch up in an evil smirk, and he tilted his head back pointedly to drain the last bit of his coffee.

"Still sore about losing the duel, are we?"

Koushiro drew himself up to his full height, which wasn't much, and said in a very dignified voice, "just because your boyfriend have...unique ways of handling a fork, doesn't mean you are smarter than the rest of us."

Ken studied his perfectly trimmed nails. "Really."

"Of course."

"And you are here because..."

"All the materials are gathered. We are good to go."

"That's too bad, because I'm not good to go."

"You can't at least check the samples? See if it's good enough for you to work with?"

"I'm very busy, Izzy."

"If what we have right now is not acceptable, then we have to raid Yagami's bedroom _again_. And we need to do that _now_ if you don't like what we have."

"I have two midterms tomorrow."

"Daisuke will be there."

"Where?"

"He's looking through Yagami's notes."

Koushiro backed up at this point because Ken appeared to be outraged.

"Him! Looking at _Yagami's _notes?" Ken let out a string of colorful curse words in French, Japanese, and Greek. "Daisuke can only ever look at _my_ school notes!"

"...Why?"

"Because he's mine!"

Koushiro ducked a flying coffee cup.

In a whirlwind of Kaiser cape...er...normal school uniform, Ichijouji stormed out of the computer lab.

"Wait!" Koushiro ran after him. "You don't know where they are!"

OOOOOO

Koushiro led Ken to a room with a closed door.

Ken burst through the door in a fit of rage only to find it empty of his dear traitorous Daisuke.

Koushiro shoved him further in and locked the door.

Ken had been tricked.

There would be no food, no Daisuke, no plans on getting the highest mark in class until he managed to forge Yagami's handwriting.

He wasn't calm enough to curse in 5 different languages.

Ken simply screamed.

OOOOOO

Ken managed to forge Yagami's writing. He used this newfound skill to curse Koushiro in writing using 20 different languages. He also made a mental note to tell Daisuke to hurt the other boy, with a fork.

The other digidestined observed with mild interest that his nails were less perfectly trimmed than normal, and that his eyes were slightly bloodshot.

Jyou was sent out to buy chocolate.

OOOOOO

As leader of current operation, Ken had no choice but to...well, lead the operation.

His eyes were sore from trying to write with as awful a color as lavender. Kaiser's maniacal laugher was louder in his head than usual, and only the thought of chocolate covered Daisuke prevented him from killing anyone.

His eyes were definitely bloodshot when he handed the completed letter to Takeru. And the others noted with some dismay the messy state of his hair.

They begun to worry Jyou hadn't bought enough chocolate.

Hikari was sent out to find Daisuke.

OOOOOO

Ken slipped the bright pink envelope into Ishida's locker, glaring at a couple of open mouthed girls who were staring in stunned silence. They scattered like pigeons and Ken stalked around the corner to where his worthless, mindless...er _wonderful_ friends were crouching.

"Did you do it?" Takeru asked.

Ken glared.

Takeru shut up.

They peered around the edge of the wall, watching as Ishida strode to his locker, followed by hordes of fan girls. Ishida undid the combination lock, and the locker door burst open, showering the blonde in an avalanche of pink and red fan mail.

By Ishida's calm expression, one could safely assume this to be relatively...normal.

He shook some flower pedals off of his hair, sent his fan club scurrying with one well placed, Yagami-trained Ishida glare, which of course had no effect on said Yagami whatsoever.

Every single scrap of pink and red was collected with vengeance, stomped on, crumpled, and dumped into the garbage.

Somewhere down the hall, an Ichijouji screamed.

Takeru speed dialed Hikari's number.

Weapon of mass destruction must be activated _now_. Did Jyou buy enough chocolate?

OOOOOO

Plan B: Ken was stealthy enough at lunch to place another copy of the awful letter in Ishida's bag. The letter had a better chance of being discovered this way, and all that remained was spying...er observation.

Yagami had a little soccer game with his team mates during lunch break. It was noted with extreme glee that Ishida ate much faster in the absence of Yagami. The blonde rushed out of the cafeteria immediately after finishing his food. The digidestined were graceful enough to give him 2 seconds, before they followed.

Ichijouji was gritting his teeth as they hid themselves. Takeru popped another piece of chocolate into Daisuke's mouth, who promptly latched on to his evil genius. Ken's smile was unnerving.

Ishida had seated himself somewhere on the bleachers, as close to the field as possible. He took a book out and pretended to read.

Yagami ran away from the soccer game to pounce his best friend. An interesting tickling match ensued, and Ishida lost. Badly.

Yagami whispered something into Ishida's ear. Ishida shook his head violently. Yagami whispered again, poking a particularly ticklish spot for emphasis, and Ishida gave in. The two grabbed their stuff, and...left.

"We lost the target," Koushiro had the nerve to say.

Ichijouji's fingers were twitching.

Takeru tore open a full package of chocolate and crammed it all into Daisuke's mouth.

"Mmmph!"

OOOOOO

"You promised."

"You were poking me!"

"You promised."

"I was threatened."

"Yama," Yamato gasped as he was grabbed and pinned against the wall. "You promised."

He sniffed dramatically. "Fine."

"I'm waiting."

Sigh. He looked left, then right. The back alley was deserted. He placed his hands on Taichi's shoulders and touched his lips to the other boy's cheek.

"Yes! Ishida Yamato has kissed me in public! Mwahahahahahahaha!"

"Shut up! You are such an idiot!"

Taichi grinned at his kawaii blushing boyfriend. "Did you make more cookies for me?"

Another sniff in disdain. "You don't deserve them."

"Yaaammmaaa. I looooove you."

"Gah!" Yamato jumped, covering Taichi's mouth. "Not so loud, okay okay, I'll get your damn cookies."

"You are so kawaii, little Yama-chan."

Yamato glared, one hand in his bag. "I am _not_ kawaii."

He paused suddenly. "What's this?" There was a bright pink envelope in his bag.

"Gah!" Taichi shuddered. "Fan mail. Burn it! Destroy it! Hurry!"

Yamato was just going to toss it when the writing on the envelope caught his eye. He glanced at Taichi, then at the envelope, and back at Taichi again.

"What?"

Wordlessly Yamato tore open the envelope to read the letter within.

"Taichi," he said, a few tense moments later. "Are you feeling all right?"

Taichi could only gape as Yamato checked him for signs of fever. "I'm fine," he managed to croak out finally.

Yamato appeared to be horrified. "You wrote me a love letter. You...wrote...me... a _love _letter."

"I didn't!"

"But this is your writing. And God it's a _love _letter!"

"I didn't write it!"

Taichi grabbed the letter and squinted at the lavender ink. "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? That's Shakespeare! Do I _know_ Shakespeare, Yama? Hmm?"

Yamato thought for a moment. "You failed everything to do with Shakespeare in English."

Taichi sagged in relief now that his boyfriend wasn't hyperventilating. "Exactly."

"Then who?"

"I bet it's Ken, or Koushiro. What a prank."

Yamato didn't reply.

"Yama?"

"It _is_ strange, Taichi. Last week they locked us in a closet for no reason. And now they've gone to all the trouble of forging your writing. What are they up to?"

They looked at each other.

"They are not trying to set us up, are they?"

Silence, then Yamato started laughing.

"Those idiots!"

"Yama?"

"They...we...you...ha ha ha ha ha."

"Yama!"

"Hilarious..."

Taichi shook him.

"Trying to set us...up..."

Sighing in defeat, Taichi decided to wait it out.

When Yamato had calmed down at last, Taichi asked hopefully, "can we tell them now?"

Yamato shook his head.

Taichi pouted.

"I want to see what else they try. This should be _most _entertaining."

And there we go with the hysterical laughing again.

Taichi would have been annoyed, except Yamato looked so...kawaii.

"You are kawaii," he said.

A couple of pigeons were startled out of their nests at the shriek _that_ statement invoked.

"Yagami! _I am NOT kawaii_!"

OOOOOO

Report: No change in the relationship between Yagami and Ishida can be observed. As it is unclear at the moment whether Ishida had read the letter, it is concluded that no further copies of the letter should be distributed. A meeting shall take place immediately to catalyze the formation of new plans.

The Effect of too much Stress on Ichijouji: Disastrous. Don't ever try this again. Ichijouji is dangerously close to bringing back Kaiser. We have observed bloodshot eyes, bitten nails, messed up hair, and feral grin.

Recommended Reversal of Ichijouji behavior: Send Daisuke with Ken on a seven day trip to a remote cabin in the woods. Given a considerable amount of sugar and the Kaiser whip, we are ninety five percent confident that Ichijouji will recover completely.

End Report.

OOOOOO

**Attempt Two Failed.**

OOOOOO

Rubisco. Is. An. Enzyme.


End file.
